A Simple Mistake
by charmed4eva112
Summary: Set during 5x20. What if someone had gotten to Kutner's apartment before he killed himself? Would he still be alive or was he destined to die? TWOSHOT
1. Chapter 1

**I was watching the newest House episode, and wondered, what if it had been preventable? What if Kutner was stopped just in time before his suicide? Because frankly, you know about 95 percent of House fans love Kutner and were sad to see him die suddenly. So, this oneshot will hopefully help us Kutner Fans get the REAL ending we truly deserve.**

"Why is our rainbow coalition missing Brown and Bi?" House asked curiously as he took off his coat. Taub, who was situated at one end of the table, answered for him.

"Thirteen's with the patient and Kutner's dog is sick. He should be in by lunch," Taub said. House looked at him for a minute. Something deep down told him that something was wrong. And of course, House's gut was never wrong. He had to go with it.

"Taub, go to Kutner's place, get him here ASAP. Or better yet, what about you Foreman?" House suggested as he walked to the coffee machine.

"Why do you care House? Kutner should be in by noon," Foreman asked curiously, putting down the file of their latest patient. House shrugged.

"Something seems off about his excuse. It seems he wants to avoid us somehow, maybe trying to not come into work today because he's too lazy, and annoyed at Taub for taking his fabulous diagnostic idea last time," House commented, causing Taub to glare.

"Can we just get back to the medicine? I'm sure Kutner's fine and telling the truth," Taub asked, annoyed, though House saw some hesitation and doubt.

"I'm sure he is, but I don't want him to miss such an interesting case. So somebody, just go and get Kutner, alright?" House said, annoyed. The door opened to find Thirteen walking in.

"Bad news, the patient wants to be released to get home to her husband- have you guys even discussed the case yet?" Thirteen asked, spotting House's file closed on the desk. House shook his head.

"Nope, I'm trying to convince Taub over here to go check on Kutner," House replied casually. Thirteen frowned.

"Why? He said he would be in by lunch," Thirteen questioned. House sighed as he picked up the file.

"Because I need my whole team in to discuss differentials, and such," House replied, annoyed. Thirteen sighed.

"I'll go," she volunteered. Foreman raised his eyebrows as the brunette grabbed her coat. House eyes her suspiciously.

"No, you stay here. Taub, you go," House ordered. Taub stood up, confused, as Thirteen slowly put her coat back.

"Wait, why me?" Taub asked. House rolled his eyes.

"Because you're his friend, and you're also really annoying me today. Now go," House said roughly before opening the file and reading through it. Taub glared at House once more before grabbing his coat and walking out.

"Ok, so what have we got?" House's voice carried as Taub walked toward the elevators. He wasn't particularly surprised that House didn't want him there, but he was sure Kutner was fine. He just needed time to heal his dog and stuff. Then again, Taub thought, he never heard Kutner mention his dog in months. It was oddly suspicious. But what could he be hiding?

Taub sighed as he got in the elevator. Once the doors closed, he got out his cellphone. He could just call and tell Kutner to come in. It wouldn't waste much time.

Dialing his friend's number, he listened to it ring once, twice, three times before it went to voicemail.

_Hey, it's Lawrence Kutner. I'm obviously not here right now, so leave a message and I'll get back to you. BEEEEEEP_

Well, that was odd, Taub decided as he slipped his phone back in his pocket as he walked to his car. Kutner always answered his phone. Then again, he could be in grief for his dog, but still, maybe House had a bad feeling. House was, unfortunately, 99 percent right most of the time.

Taub felt a pang of guilt in the pit of his stomach. He got annoyed at House for being a jerk about this, but maybe it was House's way of saying, something is wrong, I have a bad feeling today about something. Go check on Kutner. Taub didn't even have to listen to House. Maybe he felt the same thing House did the bad feeling at the pit of his stomach, behind the guilt.

Taub drove to Kutner's place as quickly as he could. Kutner was alright, he was happy and fine. He was just sleeping, that was all, Taub told himself carefully. He believed in it. After all, he talked to Kutner only an hour ago. He was fine, he sounded fine on the phone. A little miserable and depressed maybe, but he was fine, sounding like the same old Kutner.

"_Chris Taub," Taub answered his phone formally as he entered the hospital. There was a crackling on the phone before Lawrence Kutner talked._

"_Hey Chris," he said. He sounded a little tired and beaten down, not a huge trace of cheery Kutner in his voice. Taub frowned as he pressed the up button. _

"_Hey Kutner, are you ok? You sound a little weird," Taub commented. There was a pause before Kutner answered._

"_Yeah, I'm fine. It's just that my dog is sick. I woke up this morning and he was laying on the floor, all pale and stuff. So I'm staying at home this morning to take care of him," Kutner answered. Again, there was an off tone in his voice. Taub kept it to himself, thinking nothing of it._

"_Yeah, that's fine. What do I tell House though?" he asked. There was a longer pause, shuffling on Kutner's end before he answered._

"_Just tell him that I'll be in by lunch for sure," Kutner answered. Taub faintly heard warning bells going in the back of his mind, but he pushed it aside. _

"_Sure. I hope your dog feels better," Taub answered as he walked down the hall as soon as the elevator doors opened. _

"_Uh, thanks Chris. You're a great friend," Kutner said. Taub rolled his eyes._

"_Yeah, yeah, I know. See you in a few hours," Taub said. There was another pause._

"_Yeah, ok. See you later. Bye Chris," Kutner said. _

"_Bye," Taub said before the line went dead. Taub shrugged as he reached House's office, shutting his phone and putting it back into his pocket, spotting Foreman and Thirteen pooling over the files. Taub sat on a chair and flipped open the file._

"_Where's Kutner?" Foreman asked curiously, glancing at the time._

"_He's going to be late. His dog is sick," Taub answered, distracted as he read the file._

That did sound odd, now that Taub thought about it. For the first time ever, Kutner didn't sound overly cheery or happy. In fact, he sounded awful. Taub thought it could just because of his sick dog.

Why else would Kutner sound depressed? He was happy yesterday, making jokes. Yes, he was a little bit distant, but Kutner had always been a little odd some days. He was happy, he was participating in clinic duty, and he was talking normally to people.

Taub sighed as he reached Kutner's apartment. He entered the building and jogged up the stairs to his friend's apartment. Taub got ready to knock, but then he stopped. He sighed as he reached for the door handle, twisting it. Of course it was locked. Taub sighed as he quickly found the spare key on top of the door. He opened the door. It had sort of an eerie silence. He shut the door.

He heard something from Kutner's bedroom. He came to Kutner's house only a few times, just hanging out as friends, but it always felt homey. Taub sighed as he walked into the familiar apartment more before he spotted a very shocked Kutner, standing in his bedroom, looking at him. What shocked Taub even more was that he was holding a gun to his head.

"Kutner?" he asked, shocked. Kutner looked like he was trying to form the words, but he just couldn't. Taub took a cautious step toward his friend, the memory of his old friend's attempted suicide forming in his mind. No way, Lawrence Kutner, happy go lucky Kutner, the optimistic thirty three year old, could not be holding a gun to his head, as if going to kill himself.

"What are you doing?" Taub asked, taking another step. He knew he couldn't do anything drastic. Kutner could pull the trigger at any given moment. But it was Kutner, Taub thought frantically. He wouldn't possibly pull the trigger. He was too happy for that. But was he really happy? After all, Kutner had a gun to his head right now. Something was wrong with Kutner, and Taub was afraid to know what.

Kutner kept his gaze on Taub, but held the gun to his head still, afraid to move. Taub looked like he wanted to say something else, but kept his mouth shut, his mouth dry. Taub felt panicked, he never witnessed the friend actually trying to commit suicide, not like this. This time was scarier, especially seeing the gun right in front of him, directed at Kutner's head.

It felt like hours Taub stood, watching Kutner, unsure of what he would do, when really, it was only a minute. Finally, Kutner spoke.

"I'm sorry. I can't do this anymore," he said quietly. Taub paused, letting the words sink in. It could possibly be the last words he could hear from Kutner, if he pulled the trigger.

"Do what anymore? Kutner- Lawrence, talk to me. Put the gun down, please, and we can talk about this," Taub begged his friend. Kutner shook his head slowly.

"I can't," he told him. Taub took another hesitant step, but stopped when Kutner tensed.

"Lawrence, just stop and think about this. Do you really want this? Do you really want to go this way right now?" Taub asked softly. Kutner paused, thinking about this. He then shrugged.

"I really don't know," Kutner admitted. Taub sighed.

"Please, Lawrence, we'll talk about this, figure out the problem. I want to help you, I want to know why you're suddenly acting this way. Just set the gun down on the floor," Taub practically begged. Kutner paused, thinking heavily.

"Remember what I said, Lawrence, to you a few months ago? About suicide? How it isn't the way to go? It never is. There's always a way to help, and dying is not the choice. Come on Lawrence, this isn't the way to go," Taub tried. Kutner sighed hesitantly as Taub noticed his hand inching downward. He smiled slightly.

"There we go Lawrence, it's going to be fine. Set the gun down carefully now, slowly. I'm sure you want to die another way, maybe of old age, or of an accidental death. Don't kill yourself Lawrence, please. I'm begging you," Taub said, keeping his voice as calm as he could. Kutner frowned, pausing.

"Why do you care?" Kutner asked slowly. Taub shrugged.

"Because you're my friend," he said simply. Kutner paused, taking that into heart. Taub did mean it. He might have not always acknowledged it, but he was Kutner's friend, and he was happy about it.

Finally, Taub let out a breath of relief as Kutner bent down and put the gun on the floor, standing straight up. Taub took the last few strides and made it to Kutner, who sat on his bed, shaking. Taub sat beside him, kicking the gun away as he did.

"What's wrong? Why did you do this?" Taub asked gently. Kutner sighed.

"I don't know. I just haven't felt happy for a while now," Kutner started. Taub sighed as he wrapped his arm around Kutner's shoulder casually.

"What do you mean? You've always been happy at work, and even when we hung out," Taub coaxed.

"I've been miserable ever since my parents died. I've always felt like a part of me was missing. I've been hiding it for years now, convincing even myself that I'm happy. It's worked for ten years already. I've been happy, successful and nice to everyone. I've grown as a person, and I'm happy for my changes, especially since I started working for House," Kutner said.

"What's changed Lawrence? Why are you so miserable now?" Taub asked. Kutner sighed deeply, trying to get ahold of himself.

"I don't know. I started feeling miserable again for two months now, and it's getting worse. I've hidden it from everyone because I've learned to deal with it in public. But inside, I feel-broken, awful, and just plain depressed. I've tried to deny it for a while, but every since that cat incident, I felt like death was calling to me," Kutner said.

"You've acted so normal, I didn't think anything of you being depressed. Why didn't you tell any of us?" Taub asked. Kutner sighed again as he looked down.

"I didn't want you to worry about me. I had been doing so well, and then I started feeling depressed again. I didn't want you guys to know. I didn't want to admit it myself. I wanted to try to act like myself, but in truth, it's not working anymore," Kutner admitted. Taub squeezed Kutner's shoulders.

"We could have gotten you help. Like House has, like many other people. You shouldn't be ashamed of needing help to be happy. You're a great guy, Lawrence Kutner, and you deserve to be happy. You're an excellent doctor, a great colleague and an even better friend. You're the best out of all of us, well, almost as great as House. Why give that all up to stop being depressed?" Taub asked. Kutner looked up, as he let the tears flow. Taub for the next few minutes comforted Kutner. He wasn't good at it, he didn't say anything. All he did was sit with Kutner as he let the emotions flow.

Finally, Kutner managed to get under control.

"Thanks Chris, you're a great friend too. I do want to get help," Kutner admitted. Taub smiled slightly. He was so happy Kutner was willing to get help. Taub would help him through this, as would his adoptive parents. He would make sure of it.

"That's great," Taub said before he heard his phone go off. He checked the caller ID. House, as usual. Taub rolled his eyes as he ignored the call, putting his phone back in his pocket.

"House?" Kutner asked, smiling a little bit, sounding amused. Taub nodded.

"He's the one that sent me here. I guess he had a feeling something would happen. Do you want to go to the hospital? Maybe we can get you checked out for any, well, um, problems," Taub said, inwardly wincing at what he said. Kutner, however, looked calm.

"Yeah, I would like that. I might as well see if I truly am mentally depressed, if it's genetic and meant to be, or if it can be cured or something," Kutner said. Taub smiled as he stood up, helping his friend too.

"We'll see what happens. But you know, you have to be willing to do this, to help yourself be happier. It may have worked in the past, but now, you have to be willing to go to psychiatrists and take medication if needed," Taub warned him as he led him out of the apartment. Kutner nodded slowly.

"I really am. I know it will be hard, especially since right now, I want to go back into my apartment and-well, you know," Kutner said, trailing off. Taub smiled as he brought his friend to the elevator.

"Well, from now on, you're staying at my place. Just until you're happier and not willing to kill yourself of course. And you know once you go back, anything in your apartment that you can try to kill yourself with will be taken away, alright?" Taub asked him. Kutner nodded slowly.

"Of course. I almost made a stupid mistake Chris, and I want to fix it," Kutner said.

The ride back to the hospital wasn't silent in the least. Taub kept asking Kutner questions, and trying to cheer him up. Kutner managed to smile and have a good time, Taub reminding him not to fake being happy unless he truly did feel happiness, even if it was just a little bit. Kutner was happy though, talking really helped him.

"Maybe talking is like therapy to you. The more you talk about things, especially your issues, the better it makes you feel," Taub remarked as he pulled into the hospital parking lot. Kutner nodded.

"Maybe. What do we tell Cuddy and House?" he asked curiously. Taub shrugged as he parked, opening his door.

"We have to tell them the truth. They'll find out eventually, and this way, there are no secrets," Taub said. Kutner looked at the hospital, unprepared for this.

"Come on," Taub coaxed Kutner as the two walked into the hospital together.

**Ok, so for now, it's remaining a oneshot, unless you guys ask for one more chapter, which then I'll do the reactions of everyone (House, Foreman, Cuddy, Thirteen, even Cameron and Chase) when they find out about Kutner's almost suicide. But only if you guys really want to. **


	2. Chapter 2

**Well, all of you wanted a second part, so I decided to give it to you. Warning, the characters, like last chapter, probably will be OOC because I'm not really good at writing their characters, and I don't really know how they would react in THIS situation (because it would be less dramatic than when Kutner actually DIED) so any OOC ness, especially in House, please forgive me. I'm trying here, but I can't speak or write obnoxious ass so well, but I'll try. Thanks for the reviews guys. I didn't think I'd get so many, to be honest.**

**By the way, this skips a little bit of time, to Kutner's first therapy session. But there will be tons of flashbacks to what happened when Kutner told everyone. And this chapter will be fairly long. Also, near the end, there are spoilers for the last episode, Saviours. **

**Disclaimer: I only own the plotline, well, sort of. **

"Hello Lawrence, my name is Dr. Erika Robbins and I'm your therapist. Welcome to your first therapy session. Do you know why you're here?" the therapist, about her late twenties, with brunette hair and stunning blue eyes, asked Kutner. He nodded slowly, fumbling with his hands.

"I almost committed suicide," he said simply. Dr. Robbins smiled at him.

"It's good that you've decided to get help, before you resorted to that. Now, in your file, and from what your friend, Chris, has told us, you've been scared to tell everyone your feelings, is that correct?" she asked. Kutner nodded, looking at the young therapist with care. She looked like a slightly older version than Remy Hadley, except Dr. Robbins' eyes were kinder and more open to let him in, like Allison Cameron.

"Now, I'm sure you don't want to confront the reason why you killed yourself just yet, especially to a stranger, so I'll wait a little while and get to know you. Maybe you can tell me what were the reactions to your friends, family and collegues when they found out you almost killed yourself," Dr. Robbins continued. Kutner nodded, glad he didn't have to discuss the reason quite yet. He needed to get under control.

"Well, it all started with my boss, Cuddy. Chris Taub took me to her office as soon as I got to the hospital," Kutner started.

"_What am I supposed to say to Cuddy, huh?" Kutner asked as they entered the hospital. Taub shrugged innocently._

"_I don't know, you're the one that almost died. I'm sure you can think of something. I'm just here for emotional support. You'll be doing all the talking," Taub said. Kutner sighed._

"_Thanks a lot Taub," he said sarcastically. In turn, Kutner was just pleased he was feeling a little bit happier. Telling Taub his problems really did help. He felt lighter, weightless, and emotionally better. _

"_Any time. Don't worry, you'll know what to say once you get in there, you always do," Taub said calmly. Kutner nodded as the two reached Lisa Cuddy's door. They saw her situated in her office, typing something on her computer. Kutner breathed before opening the door, knocking. Cuddy looked up, startled, and frowned as she saw the two men standing there._

"_Oh hey Dr Taub, Dr Kutner, what brings you two to my office? House told me you were late so he sent Dr Taub over there. Is anything the matter? Have you gone up to see House yet?" Cuddy asked, standing up. Taub pushed Kutner a little bit forward. Kutner offered Taub a small smile as he faced Cuddy. It was now or never, he decided._

"_Um, I need to talk to you about something actually. Something that requires your help, in fact," Kutner started. Cuddy nodded as she walked around her desk._

"_Of course. What is it, Dr Kutner?" Cuddy asked. Kutner sighed as he thought of the words to say._

"_I need help. I mean, I need… professional help. A therapist of sorts, and I know we have some therapists in the hospital. And I'm sure you know places with therapists as well," Kutner blurted out. Cuddy frowned, as she looked at Taub, who was looking at the floor._

"_What do you mean? Are you ok? What's going on?" Cuddy asked, her motherly instinct coming out. Kutner took a deep breath and looked up at his boss (well, one of them anyways)._

"_I, uh, tried to kill myself this morning," Kutner said. Cuddy stood, frozen with shock. She looked at Taub, who nodded slowly, walking over to the two._

"_It's true. House sent me to check on him, and he had a gun to his head. If I had gotten there a minute later," Taub said, his voice trailing off. Kutner nodded, swallowing deeply._

"_I need help, I acknowledge that. I've been faking happy for too long, even though it's worked. I just want to not be so depressed," Kutner told her. Cuddy seemed to snap out of her shock as she nodded, touching Kutner's shoulder lightly._

"_Wow, I certainly did not expect this from you, Dr Kutner. You always seemed so happy and stuff. You're an amazing doctor, and I certainly don't want that to change. So, yes, of course. I know of a therapist that works here. She's amazing and works on our top floor, psychiatric ward. Her name's Dr. Erika Robbins and I'm sure she can help you, since she is both a therapist and a psychiatrist. You can continue to work and also to get help," Cuddy said. Kutner smiled._

"_Thanks Dr Cuddy, thanks a lot," Kutner said gratefully. Cuddy smiled._

_"Any time. And Kutner, if you need to talk, just call or come in. Don't be a stranger," Cuddy said. Kutner smiled, nodding. _

_"So, I'll call Dr Robbins down and settle all of this therapy business. You should go up to House's office and tell them. They have a right to know," Cuddy said. Kutner nodded, gulping. He just passed the easy part, telling Cuddy. Telling House, Thirteen, and Foreman, however, would be trickier because he knew them better than Cuddy. Then again, he told Taub (only because he had no choice) so this would definately be hard. _

"Ah, so Dr Cuddy took it well, then?" Dr Robbins asked. Kutner nodded, fidgeting with his hands.

"Yeah, she helped me through it, and was a friend and also my boss. She stayed professional, but still made sure I was ok," Kutner said. Dr Robbins smiled.

"Well, what happened once you went to go tell Dr House and the rest of your team?" she coaxed gently. Kutner sighed deeply, the memory coming back to him.

_"What do you think they'll say?" Taub asked Kutner, who shrugged. To be frank, he was afraid of what they'd say. Foreman would probably look at him like he was weird or something. After all, a colleague tried to kill himself. Thirteen would be very curious, shocked and probably concerned. As for House, he'd probably bug him for all the answers and treat him differently. How differently, Kutner wasn't sure. _

_Taub and Kutner reached the office much quicker than Kutner wanted. Inside, Foreman was pouring over a file, House and Thirteen nowhere in sight. Kutner sighed as Taub pushed open the door._

_"Now or never," Taub told him. Kutner nodded as Foreman looked up._

_"Hey," he said. Kutner nodded at him, unsure of what to say. He was hoping Taub could say it instead. _

_"Um, where's Thirteen and House?" Taub asked curiously. _

_"Thirteen's running some tests of Charlotte, and House is somewhere," Foreman answered. Kutner felt Taub nudge him a little bit. Kutner looked at Taub, who nodded at him, as if to encourage him. Kutner sighed and looked at Foreman._

_"Um, I need to tell you something. Of why I was late, actually," Kutner started. Foreman set down the file, nodding._

_"What is it?" Foreman asked. Kutner took a deep breath._

_"Um, I was late because....I tried to...kill myself with a gun," Kutner said. Dead silence pierced the air. Kutner saw Foreman, shock crossing his face. Taub grabbed the file, flipping it open distractedly. He clearly didn't want to deal with this right now._

_"What? But-why?" Foreman asked. Kutner shifted his feet._

_"I'd rather not talk about it right now," Kutner said uncomfortably. Foreman nodded, seeing that Kutner didn't want to talk. _

_"Um, ok. Well, Thirteen went to go run an MRI on Charlotte. Her dying husband Eddie was brought in a few minutes ago, to make her more comfortable," Foreman discussed, reading the file quickly. Taub nodded as he sat down, Kutner grabbing his own file, sitting as well, trying to focus on the case. _

_"How was her blood count?" Taub asked. Foreman sighed._

_"Normal. Well, it could be several things. It could be coronary heart disease," Foreman suggested._

_"No, she doesn't have any problems with the arteries," Taub commented._

_"Right. Let's see, chest pains and acute respiratory failure could mean sarcoidosis," Foreman suggested. _

_"Calcium levels are normal, according to the chart," Kutner imputed. He felt so useless just sitting there, listening to the ideas being bounced back. As long as he kept busy, he would be fine, right? Suddenly, the door opened to Thirteen walking in. _

_"Hey Kutner, where have you been this morning?" Thirteen asked, surprised. Kutner offered a grimacing smile._

_"At home," he answered. Thirteen sensed something from his voice, because she paused. Seeing that Kutner was keeping his mouth shut, she turned to Taub._

_"What happened?" she asked curiously. Taub hesitated, thinking deeply before answering._

_"It's better if Kutner told you himself," he said truthfully. Thirteen's eyebrows raised as she turned to the thirty three year old doctor._

_"Well? Are you ok? You look unhappy or something, not like yourself," she asked. Kutner sighed, swallowing deeply. Thirteen would be harder to tell. He was closer to Thirteen than Foreman, and she wouldn't even understand. It wouldn't be as hard as it was telling Taub (though he had no choice), but still, he would rather not tell the young doctor that he was a minute away from death. Kutner saw Foreman purse his lips together, Taub clamping his hands around the file tightly. It was now, or possibly never, Kutner said. He opened his mouth, letting the words, "I almost killed myself with my gun," flow out of his mouth. _

_Thirteen's reaction was definately...different. It was full of confusion, shock, and a little bit of anger in there._

_"Wait, what? You tried to kill yourself?" she asked, her voice dropping a little. Kutner nodded, looking down at his file so he didn't have to look at Thirteen's expression. It was a little intimidating. He sighed as he heard Foreman speak._

_"He doesn't want to talk about it right now. Let's respect his wishes and get back to our patient," he said softly. Kutner looked up to see Taub nodding._

_"Yeah, because our patient, Charlotte, is dying so to speak, and we still have no clue what's wrong with her," Taub commented. Thirteen nodded, still shocked, but turned to Kutner. _

_"Fine, we'll discuss this later. Charlotte's MRI was clean, so we still have no clue what it could be," Thirteen said, detouring away from one of the problems at hand._

_"How about __polyserositis? All the symptoms fit," Kutner suggested. Thirteen thought._

_"I guess so," she said. _

_"Great, I'll start treatment," Foreman said, standing up and walking out of the office, giving Kutner a sympathetic glance. Thirteen nodded._

_"I'll go find House and tell him this," Thirteen said, starting to exit the room. Taub nudged Kutner in the ribs, causing him to yelp, and then glare at Taub. He shrugged as Thirteen turned to them._

_"I think Kutner should tell him this," Taub suggested, looking at Thirteen, who immediately understood why. She nodded._

_"Sure. I'll go help Foreman with the treatment, and hopefully it will work," Thirteen offered. Taub nodded as he watched the doctor leave. It was only the two of them now. _

_"Why did you volunteer me to tell House about the patient?" Kutner asked. Taub gave him an 'are-you-kidding' look. _

_"So you could tell House what you did. Face it, he'll find out eventually from one of us, or even Cuddy," Taub pointed out. Kutner knew he made a good point, but he just wasn't ready yet. _

_"I know," Kutner said. And before he could say anything else to Taub, he left the office, in search of House._

"So, Dr Hadley and Dr Foreman were ok with this?" Dr Robbins asked. Kutner shook his head.

"Not exactly, at first they weren't. I actually explained everything to them after I told House. They were very weirded out and it's still shocking them. They're confused. But they're starting to be ok with it, they're being supportive," Kutner said. Dr Robbins nodded.

"And how did Dr House react to this news?" she asked gently. Kutner grimaced.

"Well, I didn't exactly run into House first, I ran into someone else," Kutner said, flashing back to after he ran out of the office.

_Kutner figured if House was anywhere, it was either Dr Wilson's office, or annoying the clinic patients to death. So he promptly headed to the clinic first. With every step he took, he worried about what House would say to this...news. House was a very observant man, and Kutner knew that House figured that he was a happy guy that wouldn't try to kill himself. House would probably be very curious and want answers. _

_On the way, lost in his thoughts, he stumbled into Allison Cameron. The blonde woman stumbled back, but both regained their balance. _

_"I am so sorry Dr Cameron, I wasn't paying attention to where I was going," Kutner apologized. Cameron let out a small laugh._

_"It's perfectly alright Dr Kutner. Hey, are you ok? You seem worried about something," Cameron noted, softening her voice. Kutner liked Cameron because she was sympathetic and kind to everyone. He didn't know her as well, but he always had a liking to her. _

_"Um, not really. I need to talk to House, it's urgent," Kutner said. Cameron sighed._

_"Well, I haven't seen House yet today," Cameron said. Kutner smiled slightly._

_"That's ok, I'll find him eventually," Kutner spotted before he heard Cuddy calling his name. He and Cameron turned to find Cuddy walking toward him._

_"Dr Kutner, I'm glad I caught up with you. I've talked to Dr Robbins, and she said she'd be happy to meet with you. I've made an appointment for you for next Wednesday, on the 7th at 11am. Oh, hello Dr Cameron," she greeted her. Cameron smiled slightly._

_"Hey Dr Cuddy. Wait, Dr Robbins, the psychiatrist? Why are you meeting with her? Are you having problems or something?" Cameron asked curiously. Kutner sighed, knowing he couldn't get out of this. _

_"Actually, yes I am. I haven't been feeling happy lately, so- I, uh, tried to take away the depression this morning," Kutner answered. Cameron's eyes widened, everything clicking into place at once._

_"Oh my god," she breathed out. Cuddy nodded slowly._

_"If Dr Taub hadn't arrived at Dr Kutner's place in time, he wouldn't be alive right now," Cuddy said sadly. Cameron looked genuinely sympathetic and shocked._

_"Wow, this is shocking. You've always seemed so cheery and happy Dr Kutner," Cameron said, concerned. Kutner nodded._

_"Yeah, I guess things surprise you in even the worst ways. Well, I have to go talk to House about his patient. I'll see you later," Kutner said before moving past the two women, toward the clinic. _

"Ok, so you met up with Dr Cameron? Ok, so what happened next? Was Dr House in the clinic?" Dr Robbins asked, genuinely intruiged. Kutner shook his head.

"No, and he wasn't in the bathrooms either. So I decided to head to Wilson's office, because I had a feeling he would have been there. Of course, I ran into Robert Chase, who happened to have heard my news from Dr Cameron, who is dating him. I am just lucky she told nobody else," Kutner said with a small laugh. Dr Robbins nodded as Kutner sighed.

_"Ah, Dr Kutner, I'm happy I ran into you," Dr Chase said as he caught up with Kutner. He looked at the young Australian doctor, confused._

_"Uh, great. What is it Dr Chase? I kind of have some matter to attend to," he asked the doctor. Chase looked honestly confused, as he tried to put his words together. Kutner knew even less about Chase than he knew about Cameron, but lately, Chase had been helping out a bit more on their cases, so he got to know the doctor a little bit better. He was a good guy, from what he got from Chase._

_"Um, Dr Cameron told me about your attempted--suicide, and was wondering if you were ok. I'm sure everyone you've told has been asking that," Chase asked uncomfortably. Kutner admired the way how Chase was a little less willing to ask him why he did it. Kutner nodded._

_"I'm fine, for now. Cuddy's gotten me a psychiatrist, and I was just about to tell House. But yes, I'm fine Dr Chase. Thanks for asking," he said kindly. Chase smiled genuinely as he hesitantly clapped a hand on his shoulder._

_"Well, that's good. I'm glad you're ok. To be honest, everyone probably would have been really upset if you weren't here with us today. So, I'm glad you're still here," Chase said. Kutner nodded at Chase. _

_"Well, I should get going. I'll see you around Dr Chase," Kutner said gratefully. Chase nodded before removing his hand from Kutner's shoulder and walking down the hall. Kutner sighed as he reached Wilson's office._

"So, I presume Dr House was in there with Dr Wilson, right?" Dr Robbins asked. Kutner nodded.

"Yeah, and the conversation was definately awkward and weird," Kutner said, reminiscing.

_Kutner knocked on Wilson's door. There was a faint, 'Come in!' as Kutner opened it. There sat House and Wilson, chatting, but turned when Kutner walked in._

_"Ah, Skutner, come in, my very late employee," House said, using the nickname he was sort of given months prior. Kutner nodded as he walked in. _

_"Sorry about that. I have news about your patient," Kutner said. House rolled his eyes as he turned to Wilson._

_"Right, before you get to that part, humour me with why you are over two hours late to work. If you have a good enough excuse, maybe I won't fire you," House said. Kutner sighed as he shut the door, Wilson glancing at him for a quick minute._

_"Are you ok?" Wilson asked Kutner. He shrugged, as House scoffed._

_"Of course he's ok. It's Kutner. He probably just-" House started before Kutner interrupted._

_"I tried to kill myself," Kutner said. Wilson's jaw dropped, as House had an unexplainable look on his face, like shock, but in a House kind of way. Kutner hated the silence that entered the room so he continued to speak._

_"Well, we think Charlotte, our patient has polyserositis, so Foreman and Thirteen has started her treatment. If we're right, she should be better within a few hours," Kutner continued, trying to keep his voice normal. Wilson seemed to snap out of it first._

_"Wait, you tried to kill yourself?! How, why?" he asked sort of angrily, but mostly shocked. Kutner bit his lip. _

_"I'd rather explain when everyone's together, maybe in House's office. I don't want to explain it five times. Let's just say, if Taub hadn't reached the apartment in time- well, um, I'm going to see how Charlotte's doing," Kutner said before turning to go. As he did, House spoke slowly._

_"Kutner, get the team in the office in twenty minutes, and whoever else knows about this, because knowing you, you blabbed to other people," House said. Kutner nodded before leaving._

"So, we gathered in House's office as he told me to. I got Cuddy, Wilson, Cameron and Chase, who managed to get their break to come into his office. Charlotte was stable, as was her husband. We had the nurses watch over them as we waited in House's office," Kutner continued.

"So, what happened when he came in?" Dr Robbins asked.

"Well," Kutner started...

_"You told Cameron and Chase?" House asked, perplexed as the two young doctors walked into the room. Kutner nodded as he sat on a chair, Thirteen beside him, her hand on his shoulder. Foreman stood at the other side of the room, arms crossed, as Taub sat on a chair beside Kutner. House remained standing, beside Cuddy and Wilson. Cameron and Chase took two chairs and sat on them. _

_"Yeah, I did," Kutner answered. House rolled his eyes._

_"Idiot," he muttered under his breath as he crossed his arms a little bit awkwardly._

_"Well, um, I think we should probably get going with this, and you could possibly tell us what exactly happened," Cuddy started. Kutner nodded slowly as he glanced at Taub, who looked no ready to speak. Kutner took a deep breath as he let the words flow._

_"Well, I've been feeling depressed for a while now, but have been hiding it. I guess not dealing with it upfront helped me to ignore the fact that I'm not happy," Kutner started as he began explaining everything that he told Taub a few hours previous. Everyone listened, and not even House interrupted. Chase held Cameron's hand as they listened intently, Foreman, sometime during his speech, walked behind Thirteen, placing his hand on her shoulder, Thirteen listening intently, and even Taub listening, while looking down. House took a seat, as Wilson remained near the door and Cuddy remained standing, looking from Kutner to everyone in the room. Once Kutner finished, he took a breath, looking down as the others reacted, Cuddy being the first to respond._

_"Wow, I can't believe you felt this way for two months. You should have told us," Cuddy whispered. Cameron nodded._

_"Suicide is never the way, you know that. You could be dead right now," Cameron said softly. House scoffed right then and there._

_"Yeah, I doubt that Skutner here would actually pull the trigger. He wouldn't have the guts. He loves us all too much," House said sarcastically. Kutner figured this was his way of showing emotion without directly saying what he felt: scared, frightened that Kutner wouldn't be here right now, and curiousity and confusion. _

_"House! Be nicer. He very well may have, and we ought to be thankful that he's here, trying to get help," Wilson hissed. House rolled his eyes._

_"Yeah, thanks to me. If I hadn't sent Taub over there, who knows what would have happened," House said. Taub just glared at House, who glared back. Kutner felt relieved just then. Knowing that everyone knew helped him. No more secrets. No more hiding things. Just the truth now._

_"Well, thanks guys. I'm glad you guys know," Kutner said. _

_"Sure. Can we get back to work now? Our patient is getting worse with every wasted moment, and we don't know what is wrong with her!" House exclaimed. Kutner nodded._

_"Sure," he said. With that, everyone started moving. Chase and Cameron smiled at Kutner before walking out of the office together. Thirteen grabbed the file as she and Foreman looked at it. Taub grabbed his own file as House grabbed a marker and glanced at the whiteboard._

_"See you later House," Wilson said, noticing House's thinking look on before he walked out. Cuddy, however, stayed behind, pausing. _

_"I need one of you guys to work in the clinic today," Cuddy said. Without glancing at her, House pointed at Kutner._

_"Take him, and get out," he mumbled. Kutner stood up, frowing._

_"Wait, why me?" Kutner asked. House looked at him._

_"Because, I don't need some depressed wack job on the most complicated case right now. We need happy, under controlled people. You tried to kill yourself this morning, so therefore, deal with your feelings with the clinc patients. You're off the cases until your therapy session. Now go," House said. Cuddy glared._

_"Be nice House, or else you're getting an extra 8 hours in the clinic, plus a whole bunch of paperwork to help me fill out," Cuddy warned. House rolled his eyes._

_"I'll just get one of the newbies to do it for me, since they're not important or busy," House said, smirking. Cuddy and Thirteen rolled their eyes._

_"We've been on the team for a year and a half. We're not newbies anymore House," Thirteen pointed out. House shrugged. Kutner sighed as he followed Cuddy out. He didn't care, he honestly didn't. Some time away from House for the next week would be good for him. He could sort himself out and stuff._

"So, Dr House gave you time in the clinic because he thought you'd be too depressed to focus on the medicine and diagnosis?" Dr Robbins asked curiously. Kutner nodded.

"Yeah. I really don't mind though. I start working with House again when the next case comes along. I heard House is close to solving this next case with this environmentalist. Dr Cameron is even helping out with the case, though Dr Chase isn't the most happy about it. Then I'll start up again," Kutner said. Dr Robbins smiled as she checked her watch.

"Well, Lawrence, we're out of time today. But Dr Cuddy made an appointment, the same time next Wednesday. If you need to come in again before then, come in. I don't mind at all. I can make time for you Lawrence," Dr Robbins said, smiling. Kutner grinned as he stood up.

"Thanks Dr Robbins- Erika, I really appreciate all of this," Kutner said gratefully. Dr Robbins stood as well.

"Any time. Have a wonderful day, and here's a prescription for anti-depressants, though, from this first session, I really think you won't be using them for a long time, six months perhaps, maybe less," Dr Robbins said, handing him the prescription. Kutner walked toward the door.

"Thanks Erika. Bye," he said before leaving the room, Dr Robbins smiling. She really did think that he'd pull through this, he'd be fine as long as he talked to someone when he felt really depressed. Dr Robbins sighed before she exited her office, shutting the light as she walked away.

**So, I really hope you enjoyed this. It's the final chapter, so whatever happens after this is up to you. I'm glad you guys are reading this. I think I might put up a long oneshot about what happened after Kutner's death, in Kutner's point of view, with a twist. It'll be Kutner in the afterlife, but him watching everyone's reactions through his eyes...with a twist. So, if you like the idea, tell me and I'll type it up (though, to be honest, I already started and finished most). So, you want me to post it, I will. Just tell me and I will. **


End file.
